For several moments, Akiko couldn’t say anything. The sense of calm had remained, and it took her a little while to marshal her thoughts back into a question.

“Ah, yes. I wanted to ask about the kami of this shrine.â€

“About the kami? Well, he’s a local kami. He looks after this area. What did you want to know about him?â€

“A male kami, then? Do kami have male and female?â€

“Yes, of course they do. Amaterasu Omikami is female, and Hachiman is male. Tamao is male, too; the final ‘o’ in his name is sometimes written with the character for “maleâ€.â€

“Sometimes?â€

“There are lots of ways of writing his name in the old documents, and three common ones. “Male spiritâ€, “tail of the Tama Riverâ€, and “string of jewelsâ€.â€

That last one gave Akiko a bit of a shock, and she looked back into the shrine.

“So, that mark is derived from the last name?â€ She pointed to the circular design on the curtains.

“That’s the shrine mon. Yes, that’s right. At least, we assume it is; the shrine has been using the mon for centuries, and there’s no surviving record of why it was chosen. I suppose it’s possible that the name came from the mon, but not very likely.â€

Akiko realised that these questions weren’t getting her any closer to what she wanted to ask. Suddenly, she had an idea.

“Are there any stories of the kami appearing as a snake? One that looks like a string of jewels?â€ The priest looked surprised.

“Have you been reading up about it?â€ Akiko shook her head. “That’s a very good question from someone who didn’t know the difference between a shrine and a temple a few days ago… I’m sorry, that was rude.â€ Akiko blushed a little, but shook her head again.

“True, though. And I’m still not entirely sure I understand the difference properly.

“Well, anyway, yes, there are such legends. Actually, the legend recorded in the <em>Fudoki</em> is of the kami appearing as a string of jewels and a snake, and changing from one to the other. And the snake retained much of the appearance of the jewels.â€

Akiko felt her heart beating faster, and her mouth went dry. It really didn’t seem likely that she could be hallucinating something that matched the legends so well.

“Actually,â€ Shiraishi continued, “the goshintai is a jewel necklace, a very old one.â€

“Goshintai?â€ Akiko tried to work out from the sounds what the word meant, but asking was likely to be quicker.

“The item that the spirit of the kami inhabits within the shrine. Almost all shrines have one.â€

“Oh? Can I see it?â€

Shiraishi looked really shocked for a moment, then smiled, and shook her head gently.

“And then back to questions like that. No, I’m afraid you can’t see the goshintai. <em>I’ve</em> never seen the goshintai. It’s not like a Buddha image, where looking at it is part of the standard prayer.â€

“If you’ve never seen it, how…â€ Akiko stopped herself. “I’m sorry, that was rude and stupid. Records.â€ Shiraishi nodded.

“It’s only taken out during disasters. Even in the air-raids it was kept inside its case. But in a fire in the eighteenth century it had to be taken out, and the priest then wrote about what it looked like.â€ Shiraishi smiled slightly. “I sometimes half wish that the shrine would burn down so that I could see what it looks like.â€

“I’m afraid I don’t understand why it’s secret.â€

“It’s not secret, really, just dangerous. Kami are not safe, you know. Even when they are on our side.â€ That made Akiko nervous again, remembering the way that the eyes had held her. What would have happened if Shiraishi had not come along when she did?

“I see,â€ she said. “I… Can I tell you something that might sound a bit strange?â€ The priest nodded, interest clear on her face. Akiko looked down, following the pattern of the grain in the boards with her eyes. She realised what she was doing, and looked back at Shiraishi, smiling apologetically. The priest was just waiting, smiling encouragingly. Akiko took a deep breath, but she couldn’t bring herself to speak while looking at Shiraishi. She turned away and looked into the shrine, at the coiled jewels on the curtains.

“I think I’ve seen Tamao.â€ She said it quickly, to get it out.

There was a long silence.

“I beg your pardon?â€ Akiko wasn’t sure how to interpret the priest’s tone, but it wasn’t encouraging. She took another deep breath.

“I’ve seen the kami. In dreams. And in the shrine. Just now, before you came out. I could see him in the shrine.â€

The silence stretched out again, and Akiko turned back to Shiraishi. The older woman’s face was set, but her eyes seemed to sparkle. Akiko looked down, and saw that the priest was wringing her hands. She looked up again.

“Don’t you believe me?â€ Akiko hadn’t meant to say that, and certainly not in such a pleading tone of voice.

“There was nothing in the shrine but chairs. I don’t know what your scheme is, but you aren’t going to trick me.â€

“Trick you?â€ Akiko screeched the words, and took a deep breath to get her voice under control. “I was hoping you would help me.â€

“If you want that sort of help, go to a psychiatrist. I’m a priest.â€

“Aren’t you supposed to deal with the kami?â€

“You can’t see them! They aren’t that sort of thing! If you could see them, don’t you think that I would? I live here, I perform rituals every day. There’s nothing to see.â€ Akiko could feel tears pricking at her eyes and, with a shock, realised that the priest was on the edge of crying as well.

“I can see him!â€

“No you can’t! You’re hallucinating! You aren’t going to con me with such a ridiculous story!â€ The priest was shouting by the end, and Akiko felt her body shudder as a sob escaped.

“I’m not trying to con you!â€ It came out as a wail, and, despair settling over her, Akiko turned away to run from the shrine, again.

This time, the priest did not call after her.